In search of a sign

You only rush from one day to the next when you’re lost and don’t know what you’re supposed to be doing.

When you have a clear sense of purpose and direction you don’t feel that anxiety to get done with today and start tomorrow.

When you don’t know what you’re doing you always hope that something will happen, any moment now, that will reaveal it to you.

If you don’t have that knowledge here where you are, you feel compelled to run somewhere to find it, the way you’d start rushing around to find your way if you were lost. You’d walk in different directions trying to find something familiar, or a landmark or anything that would tell you where you are and where you have to go.

In time, the only direction you can move is towards the future so that’s where you rush to try to find out where you stand and where you should go. In doing this you burn through the days, not enjoying any of them, and grow increasingly anxious and frustrated when tomorrow doesn’t bring any insight, and neither does the day after, nor the one after that.

I don’t have a solution to this, can’t tell you what to do about it. Perhaps we should look with more attention in the details of today? Or perhaps we should have patience until the way is shown to us. I don’t know.

All I have is the nagging feeling we might come to regret all this rushing and how little attention we paid to today. It could be a wise thing to do to look around with enough awareness, presentness, to form a memory of this place. Just in case, for the future.

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